Given how prolific a writer Warren Ellis is, it’s surprising how few Batman stories he has done… It’s not as if there isn’t a whole multiverse of high concepts out there with which he would surely have a blast.
Although Ellis has worked on virtually every genre imaginable, he is first and foremost a master of mind-blowing science fiction. His stuff combines an enamored view of scientific progress with brutally misanthropic cynicism, not unlike Black Mirror. Rather than basic technophobia, most of his stories seem fascinated by the fact that humans waste science’s benign potential by using it to do horrible things to each other.
Warren Ellis’ comics are easily recognizable because all characters speak a mix of technobabble and terse, hyperbolic, sardonic wit (just like Ellis’ public persona). His average protagonist is a hard-edged idealist with a pitch black sense of humor, preferably chain-smoking and caffeine-addicted. That said, he has done tons of work-for-hire, scripting other people’s characters and showing that he can write different kinds of voices, even if they inevitably sound snarkier coming from him. Marvel in particular has often brought in Ellis to spice up its properties, with awesome results in series like Astonishing X-Men, Avengers, Excalibur, Iron Man, Moon Knight, Ruins, Thor, Thunderbolts, Ultimate Fantastic Four, Ultimate Galactus, Ultimate Human, and Wolverine. There is also Nextwave: Agents of H.A.T.E., which is set on the Marvel Universe but it’s written in full-on Ellis-speak, with everyone sounding hilariously out-of-character!
Ellis hasn’t written nearly as much for the DC Universe. His Batman work depicts the Dark Knight as a no-nonsense crime-fighting machine. This includes the forgettable two-parter ‘Infected’ and the excellent Batman: Black & White short story ‘To Become the Bat’ which cleverly captures how Bruce’s varied training informs an investigation. In the JLA Classified arc ‘New Maps of Hell,’ Warren Ellis gave Batman a badass punchline. His most successful take on the Dark Knight, though, involved a crossover with Planetary, a series Ellis created for Wildstorm. Part of what made it so much fun was seeing his typically sarcastic heroes interact with various versions of the Caped Crusader.
This got me thinking about how great it would be to see Batman in other Warren Ellis-related team-ups. I don’t mean him teaming up with the British writer himself, even if there is an amusing precedent of Ellis riding along in superhero comics (in Powers #7). I mean teaming up with characters like these:
ANNA MERCURY
Although Warren Ellis’ protagonists tend to always sound the same, he doesn’t often get enough credit for their diversity in contrast to the overall comics’ landscape. Notably, Ellis’ books are full of strong, interesting female characters, like the leads in such cool science fiction series as Mek, Ignition City, and FreakAngels, not to mention the meta-mindfuck that is Supreme: Blue Rose. As far as sci-fi heroines go, though, Anna Mercury is in a class of her own. A special agent for the British government operating out of imaginary worlds, in her downtime Anna Louise Britton is quite mundane and down-to-earth. But when she goes on a mission, she puts on a flashy wig and a skintight outfit, and calls herself Anna Mercury – because the kind of shit she deals with, people will only believe it if it comes from a babe who looks straight out an old pulp magazine!
Besides the fun of Batman hanging out with someone who is as much into over-the-top performance art as he is (but who chooses to dazzle instead of scaring people), it would be great to see the Caped Crusader in Anna Mercury’s bizarre field of operations. For example, we first meet her on a mission in a protectorate set in a parallel world that hangs in invisible orbit around Earth; an American warship passed by for twenty minutes in 1943, which completely reshaped local politics, society, and religion. Batman would perhaps feel at home in the city of New Ataraxia, given the art deco architecture and zeppelin-filled skyline:
Anna Mercury #1
DESOLATION JONES
Throwing the Dark Knight into a mystery series may seem too obvious, but Michael Jones would make for a useful partner if Batman’s adventures ever took him into the underbelly of Los Angeles’ spy world. This brooding alcoholic former-MI6-agent-turned-private-investigator-with-a-dark-secret-in-his-past certainly knows his way around all sorts of eccentric members of the intelligence community, although his methods can be way more violent than the Caped Crusader’s.
The only complete story to feature Jones, ‘Made in England,’ is the coolest riff on Raymond Chandler’s The Big Sleep since the Coen brothers’ The Big Lebowski, if nothing else because the plot revolves around a stash of Adolf Hitler’s porn. And it’s illustrated by J.H. Williams III, who is also responsible for some of the most breathtaking Batman art out there!
Desolation Jones #1
DOKTOR SLEEPLESS
On the one hand, the parallels between Bruce Wayne and John ‘Doktor Sleepless’ Reinhart are obvious: they are both rich orphans, driven and resentful, who live in mansions and come up with theatrical alter egos to change their home city. Doktor Sleepless even has a kind of Bat-Signal projected onto the sky! That should give them plenty over which to bond.
On the other hand, Reinhart’s parents were not exactly crime victims, having been killed by the tentacles of Lovecraftian extradimensional creatures. And while Batman tries to enforce order in Gotham City, Doktor Sleepless wreaks futuristic chaos in Heavenside and tries to bring about the end of the world. Also, his versions of Alfred and Gordon are scary as hell.
Oh, and his Robin is a sexy assassin called Nurse Igor.
Doktor Sleepless #1
FRANK IRONWINE
Besides Desolation Jones, Ellis has written about plenty of detectives in his comics (like in the metafictional steampunk one-shot Aetheric Mechanics or in the psychological horror series Fell), as well as in his prose novels (in the uneven Crooked Little Vein and in the much tighter Gun Machine). However, Frank Ironwine could be a particularly interesting choice for a Batman team-up.
Brought to the page by Carla Speed McNeil’s delightfully expressive art, Frank Ironwine is a brilliant yet idiosyncratic police detective. Crucially, Ironwine’s approach to crime-solving is much closer to Columbo than to C.S.I., drawing on his profound understanding of people and history. And he is goddamn funny.
Frank Ironwine #1
JENNY SPARKS
There are a couple of characters in Warren Ellis’ revolutionary superhero comic The Authority that resemble the Dark Knight, namely the urban proto-detective Jack Hawksmoor (who can literally communicate with cities) and the gritty masked vigilante Midnighter (who can pretty much outfight anyone). If they teamed up with Batman, the inevitable macho pissing match wouldn’t necessarily be all that exciting… By contrast, I would love to see the Caped Crusader work with Jenny Sparks, the English electricity-based superheroine born in 1900 who channeled ‘the Spirit of the 20th century.’
Created by Ellis way back in Stormwatch #37, Jenny Sparks had a lifetime of crazy adventures aligned with the evolving zeitgeist (wonderfully chronicled in Mark Millar’s and John McCrea’s Jenny Sparks: The Secret History of the Authority). A firm believer that it was the duty of superheroes to actively change the world for the better instead of merely safeguarding the status quo, Jenny eventually founded and led The Authority, a super-team which took it upon itself to aggressively fight the world’s problems on a global scale. Given her take-no-shit attitude, I wonder how she would have dealt with Batman’s comparatively reactionary approach to his mission.
Stormwatch #44
NEXT: More imaginary team-ups.